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(08.25.08)
Aaaaand we're back, baby! Boy, there sure were a lot of heartbreakers in that last round, weren't there? I would not have predicted a loss for AmeriCone Dream, and it ended even closer than I imagined. It's also clear that outside of restaurants, cookbooks, and Bi-Rite Creamery in San Francisco, the country's not yet ready to cuddle fringe flavors -- avocado, ginger, bacon, and olive oil -- to their breasts. (And we even cut out flavors like Parmigiano-Reggiano [totally exists] and balsamic strawberry before getting started.)
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(08.18.09)
Living in the (comparatively) warm Bay Area has definitely softened my Midwestern hide and it's also babied my palate and kitchen. I'm excited about checking out and cooking the fruits and vegetables I would have despised in my callow youth and remembering, celebrating my sturdy roots.
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(08.17.08)
Hey! Bunting called me a "grandma"! Oh, fine. I guess I can be okay with liking the flavors of bacon, olive oil AND Butter Brickle without too much fear of suffering insta-osteoperosis. Criminy, with all this ice cream, my bones will be stronger than the Bionic Woman's.
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(08.16.08)
Hey, Stephen Colbert, where's your sense of national pride? Your duty to cone and country? Because Oregon Black Raspberry is thisclose to whipping AmeriCone Dream into a pile of melted ass cream! (I really didn't mean to make a diaper rash analogy. Sorry.)
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(08.15.08)
1 Cookies and cream vs. 16 spumoni. Okay, I admit it. I didn't know what spumoni was until Bunting put it out there for the commenters. And then I threw up in my mouth a little. Candied fruit doesn't belong in ice cream, it doesn't belong in fruitcake (which just doesn't belong period), and when it comes right down to it, I don't know where it belongs except NOT in MY mouth! Cookies and cream easily.
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(08.14.08)
Ladies and gentlemen, start your tongues! (What, that's not gross, you use your tongues to lick the ice cream all around for about an hour until it's compact and safe enough to tackle from above without fear of giving the sidewalk a sample.)
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(08.13.08)
Hello, hello, hello, my vote-happy friends! Well, Bunting and I are back to bring you yet another dairy-based bracket that is sure to have you arguing and whining just as much as the last one did.
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(08.04.08)
It appears I can't escape food talk even when yanking out pernicious wild radish and avoiding tramping on (and killing) native plants at Land's End. Not that I'm complaining, mind you, because if we hadn't started talking about food, I wouldn't be able to present you with a new summer cocktail.
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(07.13.08)
Michelob has really gone overboard with their Ultra flavors, because Lime Cactus? Pomegranate Raspberry? TUSCAN ORANGE GRAPEFRUIT? Are these beers or wine coolers? Look, if you didn't want your mass-produced, skanky beer not to taste like mass-produced, skanky beer, here's a tip: stop making mass-produced, skanky beer!
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(06.23.08)
Having firmly established myself to you as a overly particular diner who goes around most nights with a purple mouth, I never thought I would find a non-alcoholic drink that would ever satisfy me. NON-ALCOHOLIC! Can you imagine?
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(06.10.08)
Recently, the dressing room of the Wednesday taping of the Bravo A-List Awards beheld a scene straight out of The Women. Just replace Paulette Goddard's pearly whites with Bethenny Frankel's Jungle Red nails.
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(06.03.08)
Do you think the PedEgg guy saw the cheese grater and thought, "Cheese? Feet!" Or did the CheeseEgg (not its real name) guy watch the happy old lady dumping her foot shavings in the trash can and think, "Wow, I'll bet that would work really well with cheese."
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(05.06.08)
Well, here we have it, folks: the final round of the 2008 NCheeseAA. It's a great day for a game here in the Cheese House, so get out there and choose the cheese of your choice. If you want to review the bracket to see how mozz and Brit Ched got to where they are today, pop on over to the bracket.
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(05.01.08)
Blog save our sumptuous Cheese/Long live our veiny Cheese/Blog save the Cheese!/Eat her victorious/Tasty and glorious/Long to slice over us/Blog save the Cheese!/O Ched, our Choice, you bet!/Retrieve thine coronet/And wear it proud/Unwrap thy sharpest wedge/Show all you have the edge/On thee our buds we pledge/And are not cowed!
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(04.25.08)
Get out your boxes and your microplanes because after Mt. Tam and Cashel Blue made a stink in the last round, it is now time for the Elite Grate! We are drawing closer and closer to an American Cheesolution between British and Vermont Cheddar. Just don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes. (And no one else will get why that is funny because I am the biggest cheese nerd around.)
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(04.22.08)
Brie vs. Parmigiano-Reggiano. This is a bizarre match-up. One's a "lolling on the grass with grapes, a bottle of wine, a river, and shamisen" cheese, and the other is an ingredient. It's a vital, delicious ingredient, but when was the last time you planed off a dry wisp of Parm-Reg just because you were snackish?
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(04.15.08)
(Seriously, were's Dick Vitale when you need him?) Well, after an intensely sweaty round last week, we've cut the cheese (heh) contenders to 32 and these are some pretty tough match-ups, people. I don't know about you, but I wouldn't be able to choose between British Cheddar and Stilton, and the Boursin vs. Port Wine Spread is also set to be real a nail biter.
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(04.12.08)
Because of this, Lila and Mr. Fowler take Elizabeth out to a fancy restaurant to thank her for being nosy and angelic and having a gold lavaliere. Never mind that Lila eventually went back to her rich-bitchy ways. Never mind that the main story is all about "chubby" Robin Wilson losing weight, gaining lip gloss, and making Bruce Patman walk into a door -- all I took away from that book was that Elizabeth had asparagus tips at the fancy restaurant.
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(04.10.08)
Fourme d'Amb is the chocolate of blue cheeses. It melts all over the tongue with a captivating sweetness and beckons blue-haters to the dark side. Caerphilly, meanwhile, is just plain weird: its white and yellow center smells like steamed asparagus, and, back in the day, the Welsh cheese was thought to protect miners' lungs from coal dust. Yet, there's just something about it... Both cheeses attract thrill-seekers, but Caerphilly is more of a freak magnet than the genteel d'Ambert, and might be able to convince enough voters that it's way more than just a sideshow.
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(04.09.08)
Oh, yes! This is the round so many have been waiting for! We got your Baby Bel, your EZ-Cheez, your curds, and that pink and orange stuff that Hickory Farms swears has something to do with port. It's the Grocery store round and it's going to get ugly! VOTE!
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(04.08.08)
Yesterday was all about Whole Foods' groaning (if underwrapped) cheese counters, but today is Belly Up to the Deli day. We've got an intense Provolone/Havarti match-up that is certain to curdle some blood, but only until Fontina and Ricotta muscle their way onto first court and just stand around being boring. Personally, I'm curious whether Mascarpone can school Double Gloucester in the art of "nannie-nannie-buche-buche."
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(04.07.08)
4 Humboldt Fog vs. 12 Roaring 40s Blue. This could be a bloodbath, actually. Those who stick a snowy wedge of HumFog in their crisper drawer for a little amateur affinage until the sticky grey "fog" ages in toward the ash-striped center are also the ones who will go nuts for the spicy edge of the wax-wrapped Tasmanian devil...POLLS ARE OPEN!
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(04.06.08)
These days, there appears to be nothing you can't bracket. So without further ado, we bring you the proud, the mighty, the stinky: the NCheeseAA! We've got it all -- we've got stinky Italian, we've got squeaky curds, we've got spray. Hell, we've even got government cheese! We're sure you all have opinions as well, so here's your chance to get out there and rock the cheese vote.
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(03.25.08)
Casual drinkers beware, cocktail nerds have a new way of ordering drinks in San Francisco. No longer satisfied with set menus or even with drink specials du soir, the true cocktailian now knows how to order custom-made drinks, and it's definitely the In thing to do.
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(03.13.08)
I may have bowed out of recapping but I'm still watching. Have I not ears, Bravo? Have I not eyes? Have I not still a prodigious amount of judginess to weigh out? But far more to the point, Bravo: HAVE YOU STILL NOT ACQUIRED A FOOD LOVER'S COMPANION AFTER THREE MISSPELLED SEASONS?!
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(01.21.08)
Matching presidential candidates with San Francisco food.
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(01.10.09)
For those of you keeping track at home, that makes four different stages of bread prep that needed to be filmed: the unmixed ingredients, the 1-hour rise, the 12-14 hour rise, and the final product.
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(12.19.07)
That's right, people, I grew up a picky eater in Minnesota where I gagged on string beans, yet I ate snails.
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(12.06.07)
DON'T bring your kid into the store on a Saturday during the farmer's market when the crowd at the counter is so thick that it starts to eat away at our oxygen just so your kid can practice his lisping questioning skills. "Ask the lady what that cheese is." "Ask the lady if you can hold the cheese." "Ask the lady why the cheese is that color." "Ask the lady why her face is turning purple and she's starting to go into convulsions."
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(12.02.07)
However, I absorbed the concept of the Eat Local Challenge before I did "locavore," which, in all honesty, I thought had something to do with the phases of the moon and the lycanthrope society. (It's possible I've watched one too many Frasiers.)
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(11.19.07)
Stories of serving Bing Crosby a ten-second-rule turkey and a book of deliciously fattening recipes.
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(11.11.07)
On November 10, commercial crabbers from Bodega Bay to Half Moon Bay voted to postpone the opening of the crab season, set to open Thursday, November 15th.
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(11.04.07)
Yet, there I was at 4 AM following our third day of filming, reasoning how I could get bread to rise in order to save the show. (Did I mention that I didn't even have any yeast in the house?) I AM NOT A BAKER!
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(07.15.07)
Loving a pizza place even when you know you shouldn't.
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(06.07.07)
Even the color is fierce! None of this blush and bashful pink that's barely a whisper of color, this was wildhotcrazy lascivious pink. The pink of deep-bosomed sunsets, the pink of Barbie's dress from the 80s (you know the one I mean), the pink of Belle Watling's sheets, the discontinued pink of a Clinique lipstick I wore in high school. This Mount Tamalpais Vin Gris isn't "pink," it's "PINK!"
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(06.01.07)
A few seconds dip in rapidly boiling water and slightly longer in a shocking ice bath and my peas were ready. Firm and mouth-popping, the peas were as smooth as a freshly Botoxed baby's bottom with nary a wrinkle to be found. But what to do with them?
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(05.01.07)
...well, one of the avocados was doing things I've never seen an avocado do. Like grow mold. White, furry, slippery mold.
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(04.26.07)
I had this odd quirking in my mouth. My tongue felt dry and edgy and my throat was clicking in a greed for something cold, bright, topaz. Something fat. Something tire.
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(07.18.06)
Posh's thighs, Jay-Z's champagne shun, and a new summer cocktail.
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(07.12.06)
Sort of looks like a crusted acid trip, doesn't it? This is probably the most lurid pizza I've ever eaten.
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(06.29.06)
I went up to Big Cheese, who was already having a stressful day, and said, "So, I've got an idea for some power marketing. We send boxes of cheese to celebrities -- Lohan, Cruise, and whatnot -- to promote our image and raise our identity." Big Cheese looks at me, half-expectant, half-probably-figuring-out-how-to-let-my-horrific-idea-down-easy. I take a deep breath and say, "We'll call it 'Ouray for Hollywood.'" RIMSHOT! Big Cheese stares at me, then looks down, shaking her head and says, "Steph, that's why I love you."
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(06.28.06)
Here's some news for a few of you out there: Cheetos aren't local.
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(06.18.06)
Now, it has been my experience that most clam pizzas get a damp shell waved over them and call it a day, but the cherrystone pieces on the Delfina Clam Pie were so large, I initially thought they were unlisted pieces of chunky sausage.
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(05.02.06)
I see an "Oddly Enough" headline that says, "PM Eats Babies," and I'm all, "Well, at least he was eating local babies."
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(05.01.06)
There's also that newly opened jar of June Taylor Meyer Lemon Marmalade. I mean, does she use local sugar? Is there even such a thing as local sugar? And Izze, I can't give up Izze! Or tea!
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(02.16.06)
Sure, there are stacks of firm and oozy cheeses we can't get our sweaty little hands on for various and ridiculous FDA regs that have very little to do with safe-guarding public health and more to do with buckshot happy politics, and yes, a lot of them are delicious and different and worth it. However, it is patently ridiculous to elevate all those cheeses to such god-like heights just because they are illegal.
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(01.11.06)
It was a really long day. This very sweet couple comes up to the counter and the woman says softly, "We'd like you to recommend some nice cheese to watch the birds." I automatically grab ahold of some very buttery Morbier, but as they taste it, I start to wonder, "Why? What are the birds doing that needs to be watched?"
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(11.02.05)
Dear Doon Diary, How could you do this to me? You created a sparkling wine which left me crying in my beer because I had ordered only a single bottle! Your Il Circo 2004 "Il Giocoliere" Moscato d'Asti has spoiled me for all other sparkling wines!
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(09.14.05)
Dear Doon Diary, As an anniversary present to each other, The Evil Dr. Mathra and I solemnly swore to love and be drunkards for the rest of our lives.
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(06.14.04)
My recap of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan is up at Television without Pity. Writing that piece with Glark was way too much fun. Sure, it took us seven months but still, fun was had. Look for some
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(05.26.04)
Last week our Spanish/Italian cheese importer with Forever Cheese dropped by to tell us a little about the cheeses we've been getting from him. Did I say "a little"? Well, the reality is, he told us
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(05.24.04)
First things first. Enterprise finale-izes this week and soon I will be free! Free! FREE! Until next fall. Because it got renewed. I'm actually happy about that, though. More so because Boss Lady Sars
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(04.20.04)
So I "larned" my Mimolette today. I told that story, the story of Mimolette, to every customer I met. See, everyone is entranced by the look of Mimolette. Because it's orange, and bumpy, and orange.
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(07.15.03)
Just in case y'all thought that graduation meant an end to my "Tales of the Undigested," you could not be more wrong if you ordered a steak well-done. I have so many more school stories under my new a
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(07.14.03)
Where was I? Oh, yes, I pulled the recipe, planned my culinary attack and everything was pretty bumps-a-daisy. I knew I had long day ahead of me in a hot kitchen with two kinds of pastries to make and
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(07.07.03)
Man, has it been awhile or what? Nearly three months? How embarrassing. Well, my only defense is that it's been a hoppin' two months: exams, Harvard graduation, win a site award, exams, get an apartment
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(03.15.03)
I'm going to preface this entry with a little nod to the world situation. Without getting too much into my personal rhetoric, I think it is absolutely ridiculous that people are shunning French-origin
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(01.26.03)
Or, in other words, Campania and Capri. First of all, I want to thank everyone out there that sent me email and hysterical e-cards cheering me on during my studies in hell. I definitely think all the
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(01.20.03)
If there's one thing my tenure in culinary school has taught me, it's patience. Don't laugh, Mom, I'm serious. That's not to say I always stop and carefully consider every move I make in the kitchen.
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(01.08.03)
I am sitting behind a stack of index cards that rises three-and-a-half inches in the air, and if that doesn't seem very thick to you, I encourage you to take a second glance at a ruler and get back to
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(02.11.03)
As I sit here perched on the eve of what will be the culmination of my intensive five week study of wine, I find myself quickly coming a part (apart? I can't even SPELL anymore! The other day I was
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(12.18.02)
Now that we're in "the regions" of Italy and things are supposed to get molto hardo, I'm thinking it's a good idea to transcribe my class notes. I don't really expect anyone to read these or be interested
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(12.17.02)
Stephanie Vander Weide Food History Whenever I saw syllabub mentioned in my university and present-day studies of historical English society, sources appeared to differ on whether it was a drink or a
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(12.15.02)
Portabellos. That's what Bill and Judy sent us today. Portabellos! This summer it was fresh, fat, fuzzy peaches from a Maryland orchard, several baggies of sungolds and roma tomatoes from their garden
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(11.26.02)
Long time no update. Well, it's holiday time and it's also sweeps AND that Horrible Terrible No Good Very Bad Food Management Project took up far too much of my time. I'm still too annoyed to even write
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(11.10.02)
Love Lamb and Prosper Lamb is the reason why I could never be a vegetarian. I love the chops, the kabob, the legs, the stew -- all of it. In fact, it's also the only gravy made from meat juices I like
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(11.01.02)
Basics: Porky Pig Doesn't Live Here Anymore Because he's in my stomach. Yul Brenner got infected with trichinosis after eating underdone pork tenderloin at a famous New York restaurant. That's my earliest
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(10.16.02)
Steak is a dish best served cold Fall finally drags its lazy ass up to Boston and greets me by belting me a good one right in the sinuses. Yep, I hab a code. Snotty, stuffy, whiny, and crabby is how
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(10.11.02)
Hasta! Pasta! Got our quizzes back. I knew I made a couple of dumb mistakes, which resulted in me getting an 88%, but I guess that's not too bad for a first test. Let's hope it's the lowest score I get
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(10.02.02)
This is NOT the Colonel's Secret Recipe! Gah. I'm in a rotten mood. I don't know if it's because I studied incredibly hard for my Food Basics test but still couldn't list all the things that can affect egg coagulation
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(09.25.02)
Now We're in the Soup I love soups. Even if I personally don't like the flavor of this one or that one, I am enchanted by the idea of them. I've made butternut squash soup with nutmeg and chipotle
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(09.16.02)
The Day the Soufflé Fell The Day the Soufflé Fell With apologies to, but a great deal of reverence for, James Thurber. Soufflé Day. Been looking forward to this date with much trepidation. After the
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(09.09.02)
Leave it to Massachusetts to pick my first day of culinary school where I'd be spending eight hours in a roasting kitchen, walking fifteen sun-withered blocks in my clogs, socks, and long checked chef
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(08.29.02)
Classes haven't started, nor has orientation taken place, yet I feel like today was my first day at the Cambridge School of Culinary Arts. At nine o'clock, I had my first meeting with accounts payable
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